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How Can You Cope with Teen Dating Violence or Abuse?
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Violent and abusive relationships can happen in any age group; however, teens face unique challenges. What should a teen do if he or she feels that they are in an abusive relationship or is thinking of leaving a violent mate? This article can help. By Connie Limon Violent and abusive relationships can happen in any age group; however, teens face a unique set of challenges. Young teens may not know who to turn to get help - or may think that their mate's jealousy and possessiveness are just signs of true love. Teenage dating is not always an innocent phase of life just before adulthood. It can even turn deadly. Many times violence occurs after a break up in a relationship that was not previously violent. It is estimated that more than 10% of teens nationwide are in a violent dating situation. What should a teen do if he or she feels they are in an abusive relationship or is thinking of leaving a violent mate? You should seek help from a trusted adult or a domestic-violence group. Each case is different. In some cases, you may need to get an order of protection. In other cases it may be enough to just break up the relationship. Because of a teen's age and inexperience it may be harder than adults to recognize the warning signs of abuse. Teens often misinterpret warning signs of dating violence, which include jealousy, possessiveness, and sexual pressure, as signs of love rather than warning signs of abuse. A little bit of jealousy, especially in the beginning of relationships, is usually normal. If that jealousy turns into attempts to control and manipulate a person with violence, it can become very dangerous. Abusive jealousy may start with little things such as a mate forbidding you to see friends alone, becoming angry at certain kinds of clothing you wear, or hiding car keys so that you cannot leave. All these things are warning signs. They do not mean the other person loves you; the other person is not reacting normally toward you in the relationship and you probably should just move on to someone else or just out of that particular relationship. Messages can be confusing in abusive teen relationships. A mate may surprise you with flowers and beautifully written love notes, while at the same time, he or she is upset at you for visiting friends alone or is hiding your car keys so that you cannot leave. You should stop accepting the flowers and the notes; the relationship is not worth continuing. It is common for teenage victims of dating violence and abuse to keep the problem from their parents. They fear that if they tell their parents, the parents will demand a separation. Most teenage victims of dating abuse do not want this to happen. They keep hoping for the magic to return - to when the relationship was good; they continue to endure the abuse, sometimes until it is too late. More and more high schools are giving frequent presentations to teens. This has helped teens to see the warning signs of dating violence and abuse. Many teens will then come forth with their own stories, which can result in referrals to school counselors for further advice and instructions about their situations. It is not always girls who are abused in teen dating relationships. Females are more likely to be the victims of teen dating violence, but they can also be the perpetrators. Anyone can be controlling and manipulative to the point of violence. If you are a victim of teen dating violence and abuse and cannot tell your parents or do not want to tell your parents, at least talk to another trusted adult or school counselors about your problem. There are also hotlines set up in every locality for domestic violence that anyone can call for help. These lines are usually 24-hour hotlines, which means that even if you find yourself in a violent situation in the middle of the night, you can get assistance. If you find yourself in an emergency, do not hesitate to call local 911 emergency services. It could save your life. Once you are clear of the situation, you can look back and see how unproductive the relationship really was and keep moving until you find a mate who does not live his or her life just to control and manipulate your life. About the Author: Visit us at www.smalldogs2.com/DatingArticles for an extensive list of FREE reprint articles all about dating. Article Source: 1st Rate Articles - http://1stRateArticles.com |
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